Why getting clients feels harder than it should be
The six quiet patterns that keep so many solopreneurs stuck.
Hi impact maker,
For a long time, I genuinely believed that if I just did great work, the right people would find me. And sometimes they did.
But it wasn’t intentional.It wasn’t repeatable.
It was mostly me reacting to whatever landed in my inbox.
Eventually, something clicked:
Most of us were never taught how to get clients.
In many roles, sales was handled by someone else. We were hired to do the work, not to open the door. But when you work for yourself, you are the business. And learning how to bring in work in a way that feels human and relational becomes part of the job.
If getting clients feels heavy, confusing, or unpredictable, these six patterns will likely feel familiar.
They’re not mistakes.
They’re what happens when no one shows you another way.
1. You are using the wrong sales playbook
The first question is deceptively simple.
Are you selling B2B or B2C?
Because these aren’t just different audiences. They are different decision systems.
In B2B, the person you speak to is rarely the only one involved. They may need to justify the decision to finance, procurement, a manager, or a committee. Someone else might evaluate risk, budget, or timing using criteria you never hear about directly.
Your contact is not just deciding whether they like you.
They are deciding whether they can safely bring you into their organisation.
That means your job isn’t only to sound capable or inspiring. It’s to give them clarity they can repeat, language that travels, and confidence they can stand behind internally.
In B2C, this complexity collapses into one person. The decision is personal, emotional, and immediate. They don’t need internal alignment. They need clarity, trust, and a sense that you understand their world.
When sales feels hard, it’s often because someone is using the wrong playbook for the decision environment they’re actually in.
2. You are not clear who you are talking to
This is one of the biggest hidden drains I see in independent businesses.
When your message is broad, the reader has to work harder. They have to translate your words into their context and decide whether this really applies to them.
Most people won’t do that work.
They won’t say no. They’ll say “interesting” and move on.
This isn’t about narrowing yourself into a niche for the sake of it.
It’s about naming.
When you know who you’re speaking to, everything else becomes easier: writing, selling, deciding what not to do.
Naming means understanding one person’s world well enough that they recognise themselves immediately. That moment of recognition creates relief. It pulls the right people closer and quietly filters out the rest.
That’s why I often ask people to give their ideal client a name. Not as a branding exercise, but as a thinking tool.
Clarity reduces friction, for you and for them.
3. You are mentally tracking everything
Many independents carry their entire pipeline in their head.
A warm lead. A message you meant to reply to. An introduction someone mentioned in passing. A follow-up you forgot.
It’s exhausting, and it leaks opportunities.
You don’t need a complex CRM to fix this. If you need five to ten clients a year, a simple Notion board or spreadsheet is often enough.
The shift isn’t about sophistication. It’s about moving information out of your head and into a place you can trust.
Inside IMMA, people often say the same thing after setting this up: they feel lighter. They stop carrying everything mentally. They can switch off.
A simple system running quietly in the background gives you peace of mind.
4. You reach out only when you need something
This one is uncomfortable because it’s so human.
You finish a project. Your calendar opens up. Urgency creeps in.
Then you send a few friendly messages, hoping something will come of it.
People can feel this.
Someone once described it as “booty call energy,” and it stuck with me because the timing reveals the intention.
Outreach works best when you’re already in delivery mode. You’re grounded. You’re not reaching out from urgency. You’re simply staying in relationship.
A thoughtful message. A useful resource. A genuine check-in.
This is how trust compounds over time. And it’s why they come to you when they realise they need someone.
5. You have made it unintentionally hard to say yes
You do good work.
But the path to working with you feels unclear.
Your offer might be hard to find. Booking a call might take too many steps.
Pricing or scope might be vague. Your website might leave people guessing.
Often, this happens as a form of self-protection. From rejection. From wrong-fit clients. From over-commitment.
I’ve done this too.
But clarity is kindness.
A clear offer. A simple pathway. An easy way to start a conversation.
These aren’t pushy. They respect everyone’s time and energy.
6. You are chasing strangers instead of nurturing people who already trust you
When work slows down, many people think:
“I need to post more.”
“I need more visibility.”
“I need a new content strategy.”
But visibility is rarely the real bottleneck.
Most work comes through trust: past clients, colleagues, introductions, people who’ve been quietly following your work.
Posting creates awareness. Relationships create work.
Reaching out feels vulnerable, which is why it’s often avoided. But your next opportunity is usually closer than you think.
Recently inside IMMA, we held a relational outreach session. People were surprised by how many real conversations were already available to them.
The question is not who you need to find. It’s which relationships you can you nurture?
What this really comes down to
Getting clients isn’t about shouting louder.
It’s not about tricks or constant visibility.
It’s about clarity. Resonance. Making it easy to say yes. Staying in relationship.
And designing enough structure around your work so the business supports you instead of draining you.
Simple doesn’t mean easy.
But simple tends to work.
Which pattern should we go deeper on next week?
I’m happy to go deeper on one of these six patterns
Reply or add a comment with the number that resonates most:
The B2B vs B2C playbook
Naming your ideal client
Creating a simple tracking system
Breaking the “booty call outreach” pattern
Making it easy to say yes
Nurturing your network
I’ll write the most requested one next.
Behind the scenes at IMMA
This week inside the community, we’re seeing the ripple effects of our Promo Session ritual. A weekly space to review what happened, reset intention, and focus on actions that build awareness, nurture relationships, and support sales.
This Friday, we’re also gathering for our Winter Solstice event. Our version of a business Christmas. A moment to connect and close the year well.
We’re onboarding a small group into Nurture on January 7th. IMMA isn’t a click-to-enter membership. You apply, and we take the time to see if it’s the right fit.
Opportunity corner
A few roles and RFPs circulating inside IMMA this week:
Youth Impact Fund Manager (Consultancy) - Rivet
Hope and Healing Evaluation Partner - Platfform
We share more inside the community, but these are a few highlights.
If something here landed
You’re always welcome to reply and share which pattern feels most present for you right now.
I genuinely love hearing where people are in their journey.
With care,
Lilli
4 or 5 would be most interesting to me!
Thank you, great article, 2, 4 and 5 - all of interest! Thank you.